This is my journey, and why I became a yoga teacher:
I started meditating ten-fifteen years ago, but at that time I found it really hard, and could not find the motivation to a regular practice. I did some guided yoga nidra, which I liked. But I used it only occasionally. When I practiced the asanas on the other hand, I noticed that my mind got quiet, and my body felt so good. So, from the first time I tried it (about twelve years ago), I felt that I had found something very important. But still, it took some years before I started to practice on a regular basis, and it took even longer before I started to get comfortable with meditation.
About nine years ago, we went to Sri Lanka and stayed in an Ayurveda resort for one week, and then traveled around. After the retreat, I realized what kind of effect the treatment had on my body, and I got really curious about Ayurveda, food as healing, and the whole lifestyle.
But when we came back, I started working again, and everything went back to normal.
It was when I got pregnant, eight years ago, I really started to do something on a regular basis. I did guided pregnant yoga, almost every day, which ended with a visualization.
My daughter came, and it was a really hard birth, with many complications. I was so exhausted, but I did not listen, and I pushed my body to hard. I started working too soon. Then I got sick. This was six years ago. It started with fever every time I worked out. (I have been doing a lot of hard exercise, I am educated as a police officer, and had to be very fit.) My immune system got weaker and weaker, or maybe you can say, it was too strong. It was like my body was on alert, that it made me sick of everything. From the food I ate, from exercising, from every cold my daughter had and so on.
When I felt that my body was a little stronger, I got pregnant with my second daughter. After being pregnant in eight weeks my body collapsed. I had to stop working, and take care of myself. My energy was so low I sometimes had to go to bed after taken a shower. Then I started to change my eating patterns, and I went to a healer. Because no doctor could give me any reason for my condition. The healer helped me a lot. She was the first person who really saw how low my energy was. Slowly some of my energy came back.
I did a lot of visualizations and started to prepare myself for the next birth. I used a visualization which was guided of a midwife, online. Her name is Tonje Wessel, and her course is called «En god fødsel». And when I gave birth to my second daughter, it became a very unique experience. My midwife at the hospital was known to the visualization I had been doing, and she was so impressed with my breathing and my calmness through 8 hours of giving birth. She thanked me, and said I was a very good example in how important it is to prepare yourself for giving birth. I didn’t need any painkillers, I had my controlled breath. I was not afraid, even though my first giving birth was really scary and complicated.
I think it was at that time I realized what meditation can do, and I started to see things differently. I suddenly saw what a gift my children really was, and it was like my second daughter was talking a language I knew I once had spoken. She was only babbling, like a four weeks baby, but when I listened, I felt it had a lot of meaning. It was like she was telling me something really important, and it was about how things were before she came to this earth. I started to really listened to them, and the youngest was so happy and safe. Now she is four, and she has this calmness, and safeness about her.
But still I didn’t start to meditate on a regular basis. I started just before I found out I had cancer, in February 2016. I felt something was wrong with my body. I downloaded a meditation app, called Insight Timer. Its free, and have about 10 000 different guided meditations, by teachers all over the world. It changed my life and my meditation practice. I found a guided meditation called “Healing relaxation”, by Lisa Hubler. During this meditation it came clear to me that something was really wrong. And after a lot of struggling with doctors, I found that I had cervical cancer, and it had spread to my ovary.
Then I started to heal my own body. I meditated a lot, and visualized that a light went in to the area and melted all the cancer cells away. I also ate 99 percent vegan food, read about how to heal my body with whole food, and books about how to heal your body with the mind. I drank homemade green juices every day, and bought a share in Øverland, share farming. I also stopped eating sugar. It took about five weeks from the time they found the cancer, to the operation, and in that time I had manage to reduce the blood indicator on cancer with 50 percent. I didn’t have the courage to refrain from treatment, though I think I could have healed myself with more time.
When I was, (and still doing), the healing meditations, I suddenly felt a kind of energy I never have felt before. It was like goose pumps (which you can get by listening to really nice music for example). But it was inside my body and it was very cold and extremely satisfying. It spread through my whole body. It was like my body was electric, vibrating and lightning up. And suddenly I felt that I was «The light». I was God! And I just knew from the deepest of my soul that we are all one. We are all «The light». I was not religious at that time, but that was what I felt. And I know now that I was Awakening. And it changed my life. It made me extremely happy, in a time that everyone expected me to be so scared an unhappy.
I see my life in a different way now. It is as though everything has a purpose, a deeper meaning, and I am more aware of my feelings and thoughts. Sometimes, in meditation, it feels like I have a whole universe inside my body, and for me, yoga and meditation is exploring this universe, which is endless. Sometimes I find some new stars and planets, I find answers I have been looking for, but there is always a new galaxy, a new question. It feels like I am on an endless path, but for every small baby steps I take, I am closer to my true nature and spirit.
I am so interested in how to heal the body, by sound, yoga, meditation and eating the right food for your body type. I see my body differently now, I eat differently, and would like to help others with the same. I am so interested in how the body works, what the organs do, the energy in the body, and how you can heal it in a holistic way.
That is why I became a yoga teacher. My souls purpose in this life is to help others to see their own light, to find love and to heal. I want to help the one who comes to me, so they also can see that they have the opportunity to heal them selves, that we are all Light and Love!